I Want To Stir The Soup!

A while back I got the stuff to make my own laundry soap, well today was the day. I grated the Fels Naptha soap and melted it on the stove. I let the kids take turns stirring the mixture in the bucket. Evie kept whining that she wanted to stir the soup. It seems to be thickening up nicely. In fact I've used some already cause I procrastinated making it until I was out of the detergent from the store I last bought.

It was so hot in this trailer today. The thermostat at it's highest said between 82-83 degrees. I don't know what the temp outside was but it was like a sauna in here. I was glad to get out of the house after the kids got home from school. We went to the Daycare where I used to work to pick out what Antiquity pictures I wanted. I got the 12 pose package cause I couldn't make up my mind on which ones to get. Thank goodness they have layaway. I did get to bring the 10x13 home with me. I took a picture of it with my camera but it didn't take a very good one...it's a little fuzzy. When we were done we played at the playground next to the daycare and they got to catch up with old friends. It was so cute, the kids I knew from when I worked there were like, what are you doing here Miss Becky? Awh, they remember me. sniff - sniff

It's finally cooled down outside and I have the door open with the fan blowing cool air (and bugs) inside. It down poured for quite a while this afternoon/evening. There was even good sized hail coming down. Logan got excited cause he thought the storm meant no school tomorrow. Goofy boy.

Jer thought I was making mac n cheese. It looks like a snake.

Completely melted

Adding it to the washing soda, borax, and water mixture.

Jer stirring ever so carefully.

Evie finally getting to stir the soup.

It looks like turkey gravy, but smells nice.

10x13 - Aren't they all so cute! Wait til you see the other poses.

Our Little Snack Cake

I usually write about my youngest daughter Evie, but today I'm going to write about my oldest daughter who at times gets over looked.

Last night when Jim and I went to bed we laid down and as soon as our heads hit our pillows we heard a crinkling sound. We were like what is under our pillows? We lifted up our pillows to discover we each had a present from our Little Debbie wrapped in notebook paper and said To Mommy/To Daddy - Happy Easter. We were both like awh...that's sweet. We opened them and she gave her Dad a chocolate bunny and me a thing of peeps. Remember how yesterday I said she won a special Easter basket full of goodies at the egg hunt Saturday? Well, that's where she got them and she then gave them to us as presents. It's even sweeter knowing that she gave me the peeps and her Dad the chocolate because she knows her Dad doesn't like peeps. Let's all say it together....Awhhhhhhhh.

Sometimes things around here aren't always fair for Deb. She may be two years younger then Logan but she is much more responsible. When ever I need something done I'm more inclined to ask her not Logan. I know if I ask her it will usually get done and done right.

Last night after home work time I was going to have the kids clean up the livingroom. Logan got done with his before her so I had him and Jer start the cleaning up. All they wanted to do is play, fight, and doddle. Deb for some reason had four pages of home work to do and when she finally got done she started cleaning up. She got more done in 5 minutes then the boys did in 1/2 an hour. Finally I gave the boys the punishment of going to bed an hour early for not doing what they were told. They asked if they could have icecream for a bedtime snack and I of course said no. Part of the punishment. I had Deb get in the shower and when she was done I gave her a big bowl of it. Jer and Logan came out to get a drink and saw her big bowl of cold creamy goodness. Logan surprisingly took it well, but Jer got rather miffed about it. Oh well, maybe next time I give them a chore to do they'll get'r done.

I wish there was a magical maturity pill I could give to Logan. I know he is only ten, but even for a ten year old he's rather immature. I've been trying to incorporate putting more responsibility into Logan's daily routine. Expecting him to listen right away to direction and do what he needs to do in a timely fashion is like expecting a monkey not to throw it's own poo. Just like Evie, Logan's road to maturity is going to be a long one. I want to get Dr. Dobson's book called Bringing Up Boys. His other book has been helpful and I'm sure this one would be the same. Sometimes I just don't understand the male species at any age. They are such simple creatures it's almost confusing. He can't wait to go hunting with his Pap. Hunting is something else I don't understand. I can understand hunting to provide food for your family, but the desire to just go out and kill something for the sake of killing it and hanging part of it's dead carcass on your wall boggles my mind a bit. But that's a whole other post entirely, and yes I do understand the importance of population control concerning deer.

Back to my point. Deb is my sweet and thoughtful child who I am blessed to have. I am blessed to have all of them, but she makes the journey of motherhood a little extra sweet at times. She's our Debbie Doodle.

Weekend Disaster

There's something amazing that happens every weekend in my house...it gets trashed. Now this weekend the kids were gone Friday night and didn't come home until Saturday evening. Then Sunday morning we got up for church and after wards to a friends house. We didn't get home Sunday until around 6pm. So how the house got trashed since we were out more then we were home is beyond me.

Every Monday morning I wake up to a mess. I spend the entire day cleaning up the weekend disaster. Today was no exception. The kitchen was a wreck, the bathroom was covered in dirty clothes, and the living room looked like Easter threw up on it. Not to mention the three loads of laundry I did. There's actually more then that to do but my dryer is taking almost two hours to dry a load, so I only took on 3 loads. Tomorrow is another day. I need to get Jim to install a clothes line outside, but with the weather we've been having that wouldn't do me much good anyways.

The in-laws had their annual Easter egg hunt Saturday. Deb found the golden egg which meant she got a special prize basket. Jer and her cousin Harmony weren't very happy she found it before them. The day definitely tuckered the kids out. We came home and Evie crashed on the couch for an hour. She's so sweet looking when she sleeps, which is about the only time she acts sweet. She was so bad tonight I put her to bed at 7:30. It was still light out but I didn't care. While I was helping Deb with her homework she ruined my favorite lip gloss in the cat box again. Her butt  was a little red after that.

Before

After

Before

After

This is Jim's pan after making himself toast and cheese.

My bar is our catch all for everything ...including the cat.

Evie was Eastered out.

Destined For Greatness

I love my daughter...I really do...really. She's what keeps me going. Not from inspiring me through the beauty of her innocence and angelic demeanor mind you, rather that I have no choice if I want her to stay alive and keep my house intact. Not even any of my boys were quite this bad with destructive, curious, and experimental behavior. My days are spent holding my breathe until the next happening occurs.

The other day I went to put on some of my lip gloss. I had forgotten that a day or two earlier I had taken it from her. As I went to apply some it normally has a very sweet smell to it, but this time it smelled cheesy. I thought to myself, "has it expired and gone bad? I know I've had it a while". Then it hit me. The picture of taking the opened tube of glossy goodness away from her. Now see, since starting to potty train this exploratory child she has become very aware of certain parts of her body and now seems to like to put things there. I don't think I need to go any farther with why my lip gloss had an offish smell to it. Thankfully I hadn't put on more then a dot of it before pulling it away from my face to investigate it's funkiness.

Now on to today. I got a phone call earlier in the day. As I was on the cordless phone it started to beep from low battery, so I switched to the regular phone and was no longer mobile. She went into the bathroom to go potty and that was the last I saw of her until getting off the phone. I went in to discover she had smeared all my facial cleanser on the surface of the scale, opened all my lip glosses and swirled them in the cat box, and one of my favorite eye shadows is now missing completely from it's case. She had also used my eye liner to draw pictures on the side of the tub and yes, herself too. As for my missing eye shadow, perhaps I should have done a full cavity search considering her fascination with putting things "places".

I said to a friend just tonight that if I can survive this stage of her childhood then I can survive anything. Last night it was throwing popcorn at Jer and running away as she laughed hysterically, and today my entire line of beauty supplies ruined. The funny thing about her is that when she gets into trouble for doing these things she has an utterly shock reaction. She seems to act so surprised at times when she gets scolded, spanked, put on time out, or all three! Now I probably should have known better then to be on the phone, but she wasn't back there very long for the amount of damage she caused. I guess from now on I'll pay better attention to keeping the phone on it's base to charge.

All in all, I've decided to come to the conclusion that this one little child who wrecks havoc where ever she goes will some day do great things. I have to believe that...I just have to. Some day she will accomplish great things. She's obviously proven she has the balls to do it, now all she has to do is harness her power for good instead of evil. I've often worried about what kind of teenager she will be, but I think she is the type of girl who if a boy got too "touchy feely" with her would haul off and punch him in the face and I'm o-kay with that. In fact I'm more then o-kay with that. She will not be a follower but a leader of her time. Please God guide this strong willed creation of Yours and mold her to want to do GOOD things.

See the bits of cat litter stuck to the glosses?

The empty eye shadow with facial cleanser smeared on it.

Bathroom scale covered in facial cleanser.

Her morning diaper she left lay after taking it off. Ewwww.

Spaghetti Tacos!

Today is the first day off from school for the kids because of Easter. I took the kids to the store this afternoon and had them pick out what they wanted for supper. They like to watch the show ICarly and spaghetti tacos are big on that show. Well that's what they picked to have. We made spaghetti tacos for the first time and I have to say they were rather yummy.

We rented a few movies to help occupy time while they have off from school. Right now they are engrossed in Tron Legacy. I'll watch it later when the Evie monster is in bed. I hate trying to watch movies with her. She's usually fine until the popcorn runs out and then...watch out.

She's doing good with her potty training. She still has yet to master the pooping in the potty though. She's been the only one of my kids that's acted freaked out about pooping in the toilet. She's done it twice now but is very reluctant. Normally she does it when she has on her nap or bedtime diaper. She must wait until those times where she has one on...she's a tricky one.

Jer's arm pits and sides are broke out again. I'm not sure what it is other then being red, bumpy, and itchy. I've tried all kinds of creams for it but nothing really seems to help it. It's like it just has to run it's course what ever it is. Not even sure what brings it on either. It's at the stage now where all the poor kid can do is cry. It's even spread to a couple spots on his belly. I try to be careful what I put on him because certain creams burn. Hopefully this bout with it won't last long.

Yummy

Deb was the only one I got a pic of before the batteries died in my camera.

Poor kiddo

It goes up his arm as well.

Slipping

Where to begin?...I've been starting to see the signs of me slipping back to what led me to being sent to a psychiatrist. Now, I'm no where near the way I was when my Doctor sent me there, but I'm seeing signs of the overwhelming stress that put me there in the first place and am feeling myself slipping backwards. This brings a terrifying feeling of horror at the thought of ever getting like that again. For those who saw what I was like then can understand why this brings such terror to me. I'm actually approaching the one year "anniversary" of that period in time, and I don't want it coming back to throw me a party to celebrate.


There can be a lot of confusion surrounding the cause for clinical depression, especially for the person who's been diagnosed with it. I struggled when I was first diagnosed because I remember from when I was a kid sitting in church and hearing the pastor say that depression is a sin. He said if you're right with God you won't be depressed. Poppy Cock! Certainly there can be adverse affects to being out of fellowship with God but I don't believe it is as clear cut as that or black and white concerning this subject. Needless to say I struggled with guilt when I finally broke down and went on medicine. Since then I've realized that if I have a migraine I take medicine for it and taking medicine for my depression is no different. Now, I don't like the fact that I have to be on medicine to function normally just as I wouldn't like having to take medicine for migraines on a regular basis either. Suffering is a funny thing...it breaks down all walls and resistance to the point you're willing to do anything to get better. That was the point I reached a year ago. On the way to the psychiatrists I was actually hoping he was going to put me in the hospital because just the thought of having to go home and deal with everything was more then I was capable of at that point.

Slowly but surely after being put on a different and much stronger form of medication, I got better. Things have been relatively normal since then ...until. Lately I've been stressed to the point of daily headaches and by night time migraines. This morning I woke up with my jaw having a sore tired feeling like I was clenching it all night in my sleep. Perhaps the stress of the day is carrying over into my sleep and I am very well doing that. My friend suggested getting a mouth guard for at night. Maybe then I would be able to tell whether or not I'm clenching my jaw. Besides the headaches has been fatigue. All I want to do is sleep. Now I'm a person who naturally loves sleeping. I love sleeping in and taking naps. When I wake up it's with the question of, "when can I do that again?". The problem is I'm feeling the need to do it more then usual. Perhaps I physically have something going on causing me to be more tired, but I tend to think that stress has been the main culprit.

Jim's job has relieved some financial stress that we were having for a long time from when he was working at the steel mill, but because of the long hours and weeks he works it has caused other stress. We all know how draining just one small child can be, but when you have four starting at the age of ten going down to two, that's a lot at times. Most of my friends have four of their own and can relate. What I've found in myself is that when I get stressed it affects my depression. If not kept in check, it's what can cause a "relapse" of sorts. I am now at a place where I feel myself slipping and need to do something about it now before it gets bad. I am willing to do just about anything to make sure a relapse doesn't occur. Being with the kids so much without the help of my other half has been quite challenging at times. I'm currently reading The Strong Willed Child by Dr. Dobson, which has helped give me some insight into disciplining and how to's. It has helped as I've implemented some of the things I've been learning. The problem is that I'm at a point of being burned out. I need to get my strength back and learn how to deal with the stress that life and children bring. There are some things I can do to cut out stress in my life, but unfortunately not all stress can be alleviated. Stress is part of life no matter how many kids you have, how much money you make, and how much you drink ;-) I need to find a way to cope while getting my umph back at the same time. I have no other options. Kids can't go away for a while for me to recoup and I can't go anywhere away from them for a period of time either.

I try to make the most of Jim's days off to recoup as much as possible before he goes back to the grind. Like today, Jim had off today and goes back to work tomorrow. After I got up and got the kids off to school I asked Jim if I could go back to bed for a little while and sleep in. He was so sweet to oblige me in this request. I went back to sleep at 8am and didn't get up again until 11am. I haven't slept in that late since I worked second shift years ago. It was so nice. Later He shoved me out the door to go get my hair cut cause he knew I've been wanting to. He's tries to do his best to give me time off when he has off. That's the biggest thing I miss with him working so much...his support.

Besides sleeping in and getting my hair cut, I was able to give a gay man inspiration today. There was a male stylist working at the salon I went to and by his demeanor he seems to be a very "happy" man. He saw the gray streaks in my hair and freaked at the fact that they are natural. He said OMG and that he has some stuff at home to put gray streaks in his hair and I've inspired him to go home and finally do it. How special!

Well, as for recovering from the damage stress has caused, the one thing I know to do is rely on the One who's strength is revealed and shines through my weakness. His strength doesn't fail and doesn't pick up where mine leaves off...it is the only strength I should rely on and use. It's what causes me to get up each morning and just get dressed, cause some days I struggle with having enough strength of my own to just do that simple task. I'm trusting that He will help me grow even closer to Him, teach me how to rely on Him even more, and keep me from going to my "Bad Place".

My 2-3 inches shorter new do.

Super Mom

Today was my day of errands. I went to town, filled up my van, went to the post office, picked up Jim's snuff for the week, went to the bank, and then headed to Walmart for groceries. I did all this with all four kids along. Did you hear that? I had all the kids and had five stops to make. Maybe I'm patting myself on the back while you're saying, "so what?", but I'm still going to continue to pat myself and say good job.

Jim's working this weekend and I thought a trip to Walmart would help to eat up the day. Besides that we've been in desperate need of groceries for the last couple of days. What a day to go...never mind it was ridiculously busy...but they were having a special day for kids because of Easter. When you entered the store they gave you a map of the store with yellow bunnies showing where in the store they were giving out candy. My kids were so excited at the thought of free candy! I traipsed all over that store with all the kids in search of free candy. I don't think there was a part of that store I didn't push that stupid cart. Plus, in back of the electronics department they were taking free 5x7 Easter pictures. So there we were in the back of the store, Logan still wearing the same clothes from yesterday, Evie wearing one of Deb's shirts as a dress, and Jer standing there complaining he had to go pee. For a stupid picture. Oh what fun!

Well, I got most of the groceries we are going to need for the next two weeks and only spent $202. I also got the stuff I need to make my own laundry soap. I'll probably make a post for when I make it. I also got stuff to bake our own goodies and snacks, which later when I have to bake to have something snacky I'll be kicking myself in the butt. Hopefully I have enough flour cause I didn't buy any :-S

Right now Evie is taking a nap and the other kids are having quiet time. I'm having a cup of coffee while I blog and listening to the rain thanking God it's rain and not snow. I'm also hoping my poor husband who is out in the weather is staying dry. Love you baby! At least with it raining the kids won't be bugging me to go to the park or anywhere else. It's almost 4pm which means only four more hours until bedtime! I think I can make it. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I can.

Map to free candy

Free 5x7

2nd free 5x7

Evie being a camera hog

Potty Training!

I'm so excited at the thought of only having to buy diapers or pullups once a month for bedtime. Evie has been in underwear all week. She's had 4-5 pee accidents this week so far. One was my fault. It was yesterday while at the thrift store. She was in the dressing room with me and she said she had to pee. I tried to hurry but it was too late. She only uses the big potty at home so I think I will put her small one in the van for just such emergencies. My one friend said to put a little bit of cat litter in it so it doesn't slosh around til you get home. Good idea!

Every other Friday the kids stay the night at their Nan and Paps. I started seriously potty training Evie on Monday since the kids were just there this last week end. I wanted to give her two full weeks of training before she goes away from home again. Make it a little easier for them when she stays.

Jim's working this weekend. So I might see who's child I can borrow to keep mine entertained and busy. Last weekend I took Deb and a friend to the movies to see Hop. Let me tell you...a bunny that poops jelly beans could come in very handy this time of year. I'm stressing a little bit about Easter. Money has been a little tight lately and I have four Easter baskets to put together. I like to put some things in there other then just candy. One year I got each of the kids their own electric tooth brushes and other small things. It doesn't sounds like a lot but when you're doing it for 4 kids it adds up. I usually don't mind doing a little extra for the kids on holidays cause through out the rest of the year they don't get a whole lot. I'm sure I'll figure something out, I always do. I am a little excited about watching Evie "hunt" for eggs.


Well, I've got alot to do today...finish cleaning up, go to the store, take Evie to the potty every 30 minutes...sigh.

I Love My Redneck Husband

Every now and again I find my husband doing something that makes me laugh. When ever it is homework time we are always frantically looking for pencils, especially sharp ones. I keep wanting to invest in a good working sharpener, but thus far just have those chintzy ones the kids bring home from school. It takes 5 minutes to sharpen one pencil with those things. Since he got home today at a decent time he was in charge of homework while I made supper. He became frustrated with trying to find sharp pencils. I walked into the kitchen to find him running his cordless drill with a pencil hooked to the end of it in the sharpener. I'm not sure whether or not to think he's redneck for this or a genius. In a matter of seconds he had several pencils sharpened to perfection.

I like to refer to his innovations as "Jimmy Riggin". We all of course know the more politically incorrect version of that. Give that man some tools, duct tape and a wire hanger and he turns into the redneck version of MacGyver. I actually think that could be a show. It would have to star Larry the cable guy cause I'm always saying they look alike. I should pitch it to CMT. It would go good with Tom Arnold's Redneck Weddings show and the Dukes of Hazard reruns.

There is the stigma that "Country Folk" are unintelligent, but I think they are wrong. My husband is proof of that. Any time I can't figure something out that I'm trying to do I call him and he very rarely fails me. Sometimes I wonder what I would do if God forbid something ever happened to him. I'd be completely lost. Not quite as lost as he would be if something happened to me first, but none the less...lost.

 Getter Done (Jim's the one in red)

Yard Sale! It's Free!

 I've been working at organizing my house and getting rid of stuff I don't want anymore. So I am kicking off the yard sale season that will be coming up with a blog sale. Everything is free! If there is anything you want just post a comment or shoot me an e-mail. If there isn't anything you want for yourself but know someone who would...help yourself.  Alot of what I am posting is very country themed and there is some Americana themed stuff too. Happy looking!

                                             Wooden quilt rack...could be easily painted.

                                             Cherry wooden knick knack cubboard

                                Candle holder and windmill planter. Candle holders could be converted into lamps.

                                                            Ceramic picture frame

                                                      3-d light house wall hanging

                                                           Americana watering can

                                                           Americana knick knacks

                                                              Wooden heart wall hanging

                                                                        Wooden Flag

                                            Plug in star light -Works (has rubber tipped bulb)

                                                            Friendship pillow thing

                                                                 Apple wall hanging

                                                                 Country star swag

                                                          Country shower curtain

                                                                    Wooden cow

                                                                Wood wall hangings

                                                                    Old bread tin

                                                           Radio Flyer worm riding toy

                                                   Snow man (light doesn't work but still cute)

                                                        Ceramic pig and goat/sheep?

                                                         Thomas bike (too small for Jer)

                                                            Toddler Hot Wheels bike

                                                    Girls bike (too small for Deb)

 Wooden sign

Avatar air bending toy

Metal plate rack

Thanks for looking!