We never much like hearing things about ourselves from others that rings a little too true or hits a little too close to home. Many times though those around us can see these things we don't, or in most cases, those things we choose to ignore. When first being confronted with some of these things we tend to react first by becoming a little perturbed with the person or thinking that they are way off base when in fact they are dead on...ouch!
I had a moment just like this the other day with none other then my husband. Unfortunately it was one of those times where he was doing the confronting and the bringing to light...again I say ouch!
His complaint was that lately when he comes home from work all I do is complain about my day. "This went wrong...the kids did this...the kids didn't do that like they were told...blah...blah...blah". He said it seems lately all I have are bad days. He doesn't enjoy working long and hot days where he comes home exhausted to me doing nothing but...well, dare I say it?...yes I dare...bitching. Right now if you were to look up the meaning of my name it would say, "One who bitcheth". He said that when he is home all I seem to do is yell. Now don't get me wrong, he wasn't saying any of this like a jerk but rather as something that's been wearing on him. I'll admit it...most all of his complaints are true.
Another complaint is why the house is always a mess. Now messes usually don't bother him but when it's in a constant state of disarray is when it starts to grind on him. I'll also admit I've been failing when it comes to enforcing cleaning up with the kids. The problem is that I want them to clean up while I do my work, but when they are left alone to do a job they mess around until two hours have passed and the room is still a mess. I need to start supervising what they are supposed to do until it's done and if they mess around I'd be right there to dish out the immediate punishment. I don't want to have to do this because it takes away from my time...my work I could be getting done. I'd like to think after a while they will get to a point where I don't need to hoover over them to make sure they do what they are supposed to.
I'll also admit I've been feeling worn down. Worn down from the bad attitudes...from the constant battling with them to help out...the feelings they have of being entitled to only the things in life that are fun...worn down from not having my help mate around like I used to. While camping, when Evie would start to wander off and I would yell for her to come back she would just either ignore me or look back and smile. At one point one of the other parents yelled for her when she wouldn't listen for me and she came running...pathetic! Don't even get me started on how they acted when we were packing up to leave and some of the others were going swimming again before leaving. They had no idea what it took for me to go camping for three days by myself, and what's worse is...they didn't care. They have an "It's all about me attitude". I'm afraid if truth be told they got that attitude from me. I pointed that one out to myself...double ouch!
If you're a praying person reading this, please do so. I've been failing and floundering as of late. I need to start making home a place where Jim can enjoy being...make it feel like a home instead of a place full of constant stress and strife.
Rebekah wrote:
ReplyDeleteIf you're a praying person reading this, please do so.
What if the praying person is praying to Allah, or Krishna, or in the case of a Satanist, to Satan? Do you still want prayers?
Bryan - its getting kinda old. How about giving some support just for a change!
ReplyDeleteRebekah I know how you feel and my thoughts or prayers are with you. I need to work on some of those things myself.....
I don't think my posts are a game, no matter how much I like debate when it happens. When my sister felt she needed a way to do more with her life, did I not offer my assistance? Was not the very impetus of my blog to make a place for Becky and I to correspond for that purpose? Maybe that wasn't good enough, or wasn't useful to her. But its still more then beating my hands on my chest and moaning to the empty sky on her behalf.
ReplyDeleteWhat has that gotten any of our family? Its the same old mumbo-jumbo peddled to our befuddled father by a flimflam man. Do you think anything has changed? Have all the prayers and wish thinking made our parents life one iota better? Go look at dad's website. Tell me that isn't the same old tired, worn out horse that hasn't ever placed anywhere but last in any race into which its ever been put.
My life was going absolutely nowhere until I woke up and quit putting my faith in dirty atavistic peasant gods. I quit hoping that a magical invisible friend was going to make it all okay. One might as well be worshiping the cave paintings of neanderthals. I put my faith into the only things that are real in my life, my partner, and myself. I couldn't have done it without her. She stuck with me in spite of the religious bigotry I once had. I owe her everything, and all done without a single word of prayer.
@Becky, I believe in you. I think you can turn your life around. I don't necessarily think it matters if you believe in a god or not, but I don't think its going to happen if until give up on the wish-thinking. You know where my blog is. You know where my xchat is. I'm here for you as a real friggin' person if you need me, but I won't entertain delusions that bleating to gods makes any difference.
Hey. Psalms tells us to pour our hearts out to God. He is our refuge. He is our strong tower. I have experienced that in my own life. Sleepless nights with this crappy chronic illness...and God is there with me...while I cry, get angry at Him, wrench open the Bible to find something - anything - that will help. Always, He answers that cry. Always I am comforted by His word. How do I prove His tangible presence to someone who wills not to see or hear or understand? I do not. But God can...perhaps He will.
ReplyDeleteChristina Marie wrote:
ReplyDeleteHey. Psalms tells us to pour our hearts out to God.
The bible would say that wouldn't it? Be serious, could you call it a religion and make believe it was real if it didn't say something like this?
Christina Marie wrote:
God is there with me...while I cry, get angry at Him, wrench open the Bible to find something - anything - that will help. [...] Always I am comforted by His word.
This is as much as saying that religion is okay even if it isn't true because we can use it to lie to ourselves for comfort. How contemptable.
Christina Marie wrote:
Always, He answers that cry.
On what grounds do you claim god answers?
Christina Marie wrote:
How do I prove His tangible presence to someone who wills not to see or hear or understand?
If his presence were tangible, you wouldn't need to prove it. In order for a thing to be tangible it must be detectable by one of the five senses, esp. the sense of touch. With which of your senses have you detected god tangibly?